tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5888438300076664400.post3304914712810857395..comments2014-12-09T17:25:07.561-08:00Comments on Words and Images: The Influence of Control in Bechdel - (Fun Home Revision) Adamhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16302919444091859459noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5888438300076664400.post-9598211896016466332014-10-09T17:29:59.744-07:002014-10-09T17:29:59.744-07:00You say a lot in your intro. Some is obvious, som...You say a lot in your intro. Some is obvious, some is interesting, but I have no idea what you’re really up to here. By default, you should be direct! The second paragraph doesn’t help with that. Yes, the book is about multiple layers and possibilities. But what’s your idea? What do you want me to take away?<br /><br />Third paragraph - your discussion (whether it’s basically your own or rooted in your research) of the tension introduced by word vs. image, adulthood vs. childhood is good. But I don’t follow you to the end of the paragraph. What is the relationship between that tension and B. Bechdel’s angry, domineering nature? I think maybe that’s what you’re getting at, but what you’re actually trying to say here is really unclear.<br /><br />“Bechdel learned that space within house not shared among the family, but existed ruthlessly as an extension of her father.” -- an odd but very interesting phrasing. I like it.<br />Are his projects really “bourgeois”? He seems to aspire to be part of an upper class, even though economically he isn’t.<br /><br />“ Bruce needed the house to serve as a type of canvas which allows him to paint his festering repressions, as well as his ultimate desire to embody something he is fundamentally not, from a superficial outside-looking-in perspective.” -- Can you show us both how he paints his “festering repression” within the house, and why that matters to our understanding of the book? That’s a line of thinking worth pursuing if you really buy into it, but the problem is that it (like so much else in this essay) is well-worded without being clearly connected with anything else. What are you trying to do here?<br /><br />“Even the most intimate spaces for childhood expression and development were off limits to the Bechdel children. “ -- a good phrasing, but is the point just obvious? If you’re doing something non-obvious with it, *what* is your point?<br /><br />Overall: There are numerous good lines and good ideas sketched out in passing here. But I don’t see it as an essay. It’s more of an intelligent summary with various potential arguments and ideas sketched out. To the extent that you have an argument it is both overly broad and overly speculative. I have no idea what you *really* want to say about how his sexuality, her sexuality, and the house relate. How could you have been more focused? One good way would have been to focus on critical moments in the book. Rather than feeling the need to cover so much ground, and doing so much pointless summarizing along the way, you might have really focused on a much smaller selection of passages & images - for instance, you might have focused on visual depictions of their tension over her “masculinity.” You needed a clearer argument, less summarization, and a more detailed reading of *particular* moments in the text (including images).Adamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16302919444091859459noreply@blogger.com